At the age of 39 years, I have experienced the goods and bads in life. Life never gave me many options. It was never easy on me or favored me a lot. It was sometimes gentle and sometimes very tough. People say we live a predestined life. A life which is written in our Kundali when we are born and our past karma defines our destiny in this lifetime too. I would say only God knows the truth. People say we can change some events in our life by our good deeds and by praying to God. I don’t know how true it is because I could not alter my destiny by prayers. The worst happened and I could do nothing about it. I could not understand my own fault and I could not even make out why the other person was behaving so indifferently. Sometimes it gets very tough to accept the reality and even if you cry or get depressed you can do nothing about it because you can try and work out on things which are in your hands. You can try to fix things in your life but you cannot fix it.
I have faced the worst situations in life for which I was never prepared for. My husband left home and I could not make out why. His behavior towards me changed all of a sudden. A loving husband changed into an unloving person who just had complaints about me. All of a sudden my whole life changed overnight. He had complaints that I did not care for him. He left home when I was out of station at my parent's place. My husband’s family went all against me and just wanted to get rid of me. I was still in a state of trauma and could not understand what to do or how to fix my life. My whole world crashed in front of me and I felt an injustice was done to me. My parents supported me in this worst phase of life. Dad advised me to forget the past and move on in my life because he felt nothing could be fixed in my life. Forgetting my 11 years old marriage and daughter was difficult but I survived the worst when I could not accept the reality. I understood that you have to accept the reality and things which happen in your life whether you want or not. You have to accept the sorrows and pains with a brave heart because the more you complain the tougher it gets. There were times when I just wanted to end my life but I motivated myself just to live and not to think too much. I understood the best that you can do is live your life and not apply logic. All illogical things happen. The more practical you are the better it gets to accept life.
There are so many questions which came in front of me. Should we turn into heartless, hard-hearted people and just live our life or be soft-hearted and accept the worst in life with a brave heart. It was for the first time I understood why people turned insane or committed suicide. Everything which I saw on television was happening in my own life and I could not do anything about it. I felt so helpless at that time but I lived that phase and now I am in a better situation than before. I think I can accept what comes in front of me and accept what life throws on me. Life teaches its own lessons at perfect timings and we have to be ready to learn from it.
The more you complain the tougher it gets. The more you blame others for your misery the longer the blame game gets. When you cannot accept whatever is going on in your life you cannot fix it. Sometimes you can fix the wrong and at other times you just have to be happy with whatever life decides for you. Complaining, crying and having grudges against others is not going to help. In Bhagwat Gita Sri Krishna says “Whatever happens, happens for good”. How tough we are can only be seen on how we react after the storm has passed. It is easy for anyone to sail the boat when the sea is smooth. The best sailor is the one who sails even in the stormy water and still maintains his cool. That is life. You have to maintain your cool even after the storm has passed or the worst has happened in your life. How best you are at recollecting yourself and setting your life on the right track is what determines the future course of your life. Every event which happens in our life tests our patience and trust. It is all upon us how we face the worst and transform our lives accordingly. We have two options in front of us either to turn into a better person or turn into a bitter person. Life is never easy on anyone and when it shows its true colors it can be really very tough. Sometimes you can see only never-ending darkness and no light. There is sunshine and a silver lining at the end of the dark cloud but you cannot see that. Every person has a different life and you cannot compare your life with others and say why they have a better life than you. Every individual is born on this earth to do a certain task and hence they are trained accordingly by life. I would say do your best and leave the rest on God. Have trust and have faith that God will decide the best for you and you live your life with a happy frame of mind.
I am myself a motivational speaker. I teach other people and make their lives better but when the worst phase came in my life I was myself shaken. It took some time for me to recover and I exactly know how it feels when someone close to you breaks your heart and hurts you. But the biggest truth about life is it moves on. Time does not stop so does life. If you stop you will be thrown out and it will get difficult to put your life back on track. The best you can do is do your work and have patience with whatever is happening in your life. You cannot turn time fast forward nor live life backward. What you can do is always be in the present moment and accept all the realities of the day which is in front of you and not bother much about the future. The future is an unlived and unknown reality. You can prepare for it, plan it but you cannot decide what will happen in the future because time will run at its own pace. You have to adjust yourself and do your best.
People around you will sometimes mock at you and give you “N” number of suggestions but you have to decide what is best for you. Apply your own brain, turn inwards and trust people who are close to you when you cannot make the best decisions because in those dark moments they will help you. Once you conquer the darkness your whole life is in front of you. Live your best life and don’t complain about it.
